Breaking a Jinx

"Hey! We'll soon have a new house! My dad's making plans" I had shreiked to my friend in delight. I was in Class IV or V then. "Will you be in the same school or will you join Seventh Day" he had asked in turn. Soon he and I both forgot about the house. Again in Class VI, we started looking for a house. We even visited one. I saw dad talking to the owner and later in the evening, to all our relatives. "He's agreed for Rs. XXX. I think it's reasonable". I exchanged notes with my sis. "There is more space in front of the house. We can have a garden". "I want a swing" she responded. The house never became ours though.

Many such moments came and went by. With each such episode my mom went a little down. A little sad at first and a lot cynical later. Both mom and Kumi (my sister) always yearned and pined for the house. Being the women they were it was probably only natural. Dad had built one before he was married to mom but he sold it and gave away the proceeds to his sister and brother. Mom hadn't cribbed, I remember.

Even after my education was over, the plans were still being made, none materializing. Many thousands went down the drain in the form of payments to brokers, advances to the house-owners and travel. We'd be close to owning our own home. But never close enough to call it our own. I'd become stoical about the whole thing and hardly paid any heed when mom would bemoan about not having a roof that we could call our very own, very often.

Most of the money parents had earned was spent not just on our education but also on our relatives' wellbeing. Both my father's and my mother's siblings grew up at our place, were educated by my parents and helped in settling their lives. They all had gone on to do well. Including having their own homes. In Bangalore, Mysore and elsewhere. Some even multiple properties. We'd stayed where we had started from. In the same rented house status - the houses changed, so did the rentals though.

My sister used to get very bitter about the house we stayed in. She used to feel embarassed to bring her friends into the place. "I hate it" she would say vehemently. I had no problems though. There were times my mom would quarrel with dad, "Because of you we haven't even been able to have the security of the house". Dad would go off on a different tangent, "IF only my children had listened to me". "I'll die without seeing our home" mom. "Why can't you be responsible for anything?" sis. Sometimes it hurt, sometimes it didn't matter.

When I returned to Bangalore after 10 years, building a house was the priority. However, ever since September 2007 nothing had been done. Even after mom transferred the site to my name so we could get loan easily from a bank. Kumi sent money too. All of her hard-earned money in the UK. Despite the opposition from her in-laws (that almost threatened her marriage) and despite her own jobless situation. Mom once flew off her handle at me. Dad and I blamed each other for the non-starter now. First it was plan approvals, next it was change of the site account. Then it was inauspicious days. Non-availability of a contractor. Phew! There was no end to our excuses.

Something that had NOT happened for 30 years wasn't wiling to happen in a hurry now. Relatives in Bangalore tried dissuading parents to construct the house NOW in hometown (Kolar). They said, "Sudhir would settle anyways in Bangalore. Why waste money building a house that none would later live in?" Parents were horrified to hear. They almost believed that I didn't want to get back to Kolar. My granny offered her own property to us. It was like adding fuel to fire for mom. She hated the gesture and threw a tantrum at us all. For a woman who's self-reliance personified, it was shameful to hear those words of offer.

All sob stories largely have a good end in movies. It happened here too. I, who was least concerned until now, suddenly transformed. I set first a deadline by which the house would be ready. I declared, "We will conduct the house-warming ceremony in May 2009". Dad continued to read his newspaper. Mom looked at me with blank eyes. "Kumi, I'm committed to build the house before May" I called sis to tell her and she changed the topic. None trusted that I'd do anything.

After having been everything - shirker, liar, lazy, irresponsible - I've begun a new beginning now. We broke the jinx. On 5 November, we did the Bhumi Puja. Despite the hiccups before the D-day (father's tantrums, mother's doubts, Kumi's cold vibes, relatives' rues over contractor et al) we had a smooth take-off.

Yes, mom and dad now believe that the house-warming could happen in May! I smile. Even as I worry about handling Kumi's mails of accusations and anger over the construction.