The Other Woman!

I ran into her the first time when I was graduating.  Just a casual meet to begin with.  And, I wasn’t sure if I enjoyed her company.  As I went home when the college closed for holidays I forgot her, didn’t think of her much.  But I saw her again as I joined my new course and with time we grew close and we became fond of each other.  During the day I wouldn’t yearn for her but evenings and nights I’d be drawn to her, like the proverbial flies to the lamp.  She had me firmly in her awe.  I’d burn with desire for her.

When I was caught ‘red-handed’ in her company by my dad, I felt embarrassed.  He wasn’t too happy with the two of us together.  I promised I’ll part ways.  Only to return to her soon.  With each passing day her influence over me only grew from strength to strength without showing any signs of weakening.  Some of my friends too didn’t approve of her.  I couldn’t care less.  I loved her, right?

Years passed and so did our togetherness.  I swore I couldn’t live without her; my life was incomplete if she weren’t there.  I was her slave and she was my master.  S&M?  With time I also realized her negative impact on me.  I was losing sleep over her, my health too.  Not to mention the money I’d squander over her, all for those few moments of unbridled passion and joy.  I grew older while she looked as pretty, enchanting as ever.  Just that she grew pricier.  I was addicted to her.  I thought I felt complete with her around me, even as she rarely gave a damn. 

I couldn’t marry her.  She was just the perfect ‘other woman’.  As I started courting my fiancé (and later my wife and much later, my ex-wife) she frowned upon the prospects of having to share me with another.  Another promise to stay away - that soon turned as empty and as hollow as earlier.  My better-half grew angry, fought and threw a fit several times over this.  I felt like a frog in the blender.  ‘Why couldn’t I have both of them?’ I wondered, not having courage enough to voice it aloud! 

One day – in the land of the Buddha – I attained Nirvana and chose to leave her – for good.  I called my wife, “I have a news for you.  I’ve called it quits”.  “Too late” she responded, “I am asking out.  Good bye”.  And, there I was left, high and dry, by the two women I loved.  One I’d decided to leave and the other left me!

Four years, I stayed away – though I encountered my mistress occasionally.  At the parties I’d attend or when I felt lonely and wanted company.  “I’m not going to get back to her again forever” I’d tell myself after these chance meetings.  By now most people who mattered in life had heaved a sigh of relief that I was out of her vice-like grip.  ‘Medusa’ they’d call her.  If only they knew!

And, suddenly one day I invited her back into my life again.  I wasn’t handling my life well.  Those who saw me with her, wondered, baulked.  Even tried to voice their disappointment and surprise.  But,  what the heck! I thought I needed someone around.   Someone who’d not tell me what to do and what not and just keep me company when I wanted.  Like her.  My cigarette.

It’s been a month since I’m smoking again.  I know I should quit her.  I’m not yet doing it.